It's Ban Hammer time!

"Future next gen S2000 owner" (future-next-gen-s2000-owner) 07/13/2020 at 11:49 • Filed to: shitpost, Ban Hammer

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You are given the power to ordain any and all automotive decisions. You have been given unlimited power yet you can only use it once and to ban something automotive from existence.

Never mind the lo gistics, this is all black magic.

I am henceforth banning drum brakes. They are stupid and dumb and I hate them. All cars will have their drums magically swapped over to discs and OEMs are not allowed to ever again put them on a production vehicle.

Let the banning begin!

What would Oppo ban?

Barstool at the salt flats for your time.

Chinny Raccoon > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 11:58

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Road salt.

Future next gen S2000 owner > Chinny Raccoon 07/13/2020 at 11:59

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You have used your powers for good.

smobgirl > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 11:59

3

Barstool.

BaconSandwich is tasty. > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 11:59

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I’ll second banning drum brakes.

Or aftermarket tinted tail lights.

Maybe excessively loud exhausts on street cars and motorcycles.  (Loud exhausts on track vehicles- totally fine).

MonkeePuzzle > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:00

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this nonsense!

bob and john > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:01

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Unskilled drivers. you have to pass a performance exam (do an auto x in under X time in Y car) to be able to drive actual fast stuff. 

P5guy now GTIguy > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:01

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GM reverse lights that turn on when you unlock the car. 

ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:02

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Drum brakes are fine if you’ve got a couple of formerly very common special tools. I’m torn between banning stance , donks or bro trucks, but based on my general interactions of folks in those various groups I’m going to go with bro-trucks. I’ve encountered a lot terrible people driving bro trucks. The other two groups I tend to merely just disagree  with their tastes.

Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now) > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:02

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Cars

hillrat > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:02

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Sports cars that are not available with 3 pedals. 

Long_Voyager94 > Chinny Raccoon 07/13/2020 at 12:03

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This is a valid banning.

jminer > Chinny Raccoon 07/13/2020 at 12:03

4

This is the answer!

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:03

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A LOT of car youtubers (or cartubers?? Sounds stupid)....

Road salt

GM’s parking brake/reverse light nonsense

Certain emissions regulations for certain brands

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:04

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Unsafe mods...i.e. improper lifts, cut springs, blacked out lights, etc

facw > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:04

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Ban lifting (and if we can work it into the same ban, lowering too). Bumpers and headlights are meant to be at specific heights and moving them is really not a great idea. For people who actually need their vehicle lifted for offroading, they can trailer it, or they can rig up some regulation height bumpers and lights that can be detached for approach and departure angles.

DAWRX - The Herb Strikes Back > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:05

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Those massive custom steel bumpers that the Bros put on their massive lifted pickup trucks. 

TheJWT > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:05

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Having basic things (a/c, music volume, etc...) controlled by a touchscreen. 

way2blu does a rev update > BaconSandwich is tasty. 07/13/2020 at 12:05

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What if my daily is also a  track vehicle? Ban or nah? *prepares to unbolt muffler*

bob and john > MonkeePuzzle 07/13/2020 at 12:05

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I have a new levels of hatred for you.

fucking hell that video probably has the WORSTtT ‘opened / veiwed in full? ratio on the planet

JustAnotherG6 > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:05

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I’m tempted to say speed limits but the more reasonable side of me is saying ‘fast lane campers’.

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:06

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Can I keep the drum brake that is a parking brake? It’s not like it actually wears out and needs to be serviced since it’s not used when the car is in motion. Most of my cars have had manual transmissions, but even on the automatics I used my parking brake, and they just didn't wear out.

Other than that one exception, yeah, ban ‘em.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:06

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Captive rotors.

wafflesnfalafel > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:08

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not being able to shut off “start/stop” permanently rather than having to go through some set of menus every time you start the car...

HammerheadFistpunch > Chinny Raccoon 07/13/2020 at 12:09

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100% not just for the cars but for the environment.  a lot of the PM emissions during our bad winter air is salt dust. interacting with ozone and other particulates.

i86hotdogs > BaconSandwich is tasty. 07/13/2020 at 12:09

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Yeah, same question as way2blue.

*starts chipping off the JB weld used to hold up my muffler hangers*

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:09

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Yay, my car otter-magically gets rear disk brakes! What a luxury!

I would chose to ban automotive pretentiousness . Never again will people take themselves and their cars too dang seriously. If they like pink and are afraid of resale value, poof! Their car is pink anyways! If they need to haul around a family but care too much about what others think, poof! Their B MW X6 M Sport turns into a Chrysler Pacifica!

I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:09

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I am henceforth banning drum brakes. They are stupid and dumb and I hate them. All cars will have their drums magically swapped over to discs

God, please. I still have drums in the back of my Golf, have yet to change them. Woefully inadequate this weekend at the Tail of the Dragon. Need to spec everything for replacement.

i86hotdogs > bob and john 07/13/2020 at 12:10

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Hate to admit it, but I love this song.

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > MonkeePuzzle 07/13/2020 at 12:10

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Silly Monkee, you just banned yourself!

I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com 07/13/2020 at 12:11

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What special tools? The thingy you use to compress the spring and turn that pin to release it and a square adjuster wrench?

Mondial goes to 11 > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:12

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Drum brakes = Shit!

HammerheadFistpunch > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 07/13/2020 at 12:12

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preach.  Got some new rotors to put on soon...which means 2 front hub jobs.

way2blu does a rev update > facw 07/13/2020 at 12:12

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In defense of lowering, generally lowered cars don’t present the major danger to others that lifted trucks & SUVs do.

Sure, a hella- stanced vehicle may not handle well and may not provide the same safety to the owner as a stock example, but it’s not going to be the public safety hazard that a lifted truck will be.  

Furthermore, most cars that get lowered aren’t going to have an appreciably different bumper height anyway.

*My MR2’s coilovers are at factory stock ride height and leveled for proper headlight aiming & handling. I haven’t slammed it super low but I’ve got respect for people who make compromises  to do so.

bob and john > i86hotdogs 07/13/2020 at 12:13

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the song is nice. and it has a nice message.

but. GAH., 

bob and john > i86hotdogs 07/13/2020 at 12:13

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the song is nice. and it has a nice message.

but. GAH., 

way2blu does a rev update > DAWRX - The Herb Strikes Back 07/13/2020 at 12:14

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I’d mandate a Mansfield Bar on any vehicle lifted such that the bumper height is no longer stock:

HammerheadFistpunch > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:14

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Its funny, I don’t quite get the drum hate.  We had them on our GMT400 3/4 ton and they worked great.  The rear drums were a much bigger part of the total braking force than the crappy single floating piston fronts.  If you were towing with that thing those rear brakes got the job done and we never had to replace them.

Long_Voyager94 > ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com 07/13/2020 at 12:16

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I’ve always found a vise grip and a screwdriver replace any “special” tools needed.

Long_Voyager94 > facw 07/13/2020 at 12:18

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Lifting is fine, when it’s 3" or less.

6-8-10-12" lifts are completely unnecessary for a road vehicle.

MonkeePuzzle > bob and john 07/13/2020 at 12:19

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bet this one is the highest opened : viewed- in- full

Cé hé sin > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:19

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Rust.

way2blu does a rev update > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:19

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I drive some l o w cars and I’d love to ban ride height increases that don’t include safety upgrades too.

My MR2 (stock height) is low enough that if I were hit by a lifted truck, I’d be hit by the axle hardware and not the bumper.

Without a mansfield bar (like commercial trucks are mandated to have) lifted pickups are a major problem.

i86hotdogs > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:19

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Not necessarily a ban, but mandatory automotive maintenance classes for all students at either 14 or 15. Checking basic fluids, changing a tire, pumping gas, basic troubleshooting. If you don’t pass, you cannot take a drivers test, you cannot get your license, therefore you cannot drive. I was shocked when I learned people in COLLEGE did not know how to pump their own gas because “my parents did it for me”. More than one occur rence; more than two; more than THREE separate people. Likewise, my sister did not know a car needed an oil change, and proceeded to seize the engine in her N issan after going nearly 60k miles without a change. Sometimes I think I was adopted.

Also, mandatory drivers test every 5 years once you turn 60. Every 2 years once you turn 75.

If I HAVE to ban something, though. It will be parents providing a vehicle that cost over $10,000 to their kids under 18 . Every new driver must drive a shitbox before they can delve into cars with lane departure and rear cameras.

Long_Voyager94 > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:20

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In defense of drum brakes, they are perfectly adequate for commuter vehicles, are stupid cheap to replace, and generally far outlast discs in normal use.

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > MonkeePuzzle 07/13/2020 at 12:20

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Haha...Y outube played an add before I had to watch anything

For Sweden > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:20

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Ban all oil filters accessed from the bottom of the engine.

Ban all transmission pans without a drain plug.

Cash Rewards > way2blu does a rev update 07/13/2020 at 12:21

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Do autocross vehicles count? My Miata is fo r fun times and autocross, and if I'm honest the exhaust is a little unreasonable, volume wise. 

MonkeePuzzle > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s 07/13/2020 at 12:22

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you poors and your non-subscription YT

I’ve got a free paid YT if you want to join my “family ” circle thing

bob and john > MonkeePuzzle 07/13/2020 at 12:23

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Just Jeepin' > P5guy now GTIguy 07/13/2020 at 12:23

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Yes!

https://oppositelock.kinja.com/rage-level-high-1831342706

dogisbadob > Chinny Raccoon 07/13/2020 at 12:25

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The best part is that a viable alternative exists: CMA (calcium magnesium acetate)

It’s more expensive than the regular salt, but not when you account for the cost of damage

CMA costs more than salt, but it costs less than salt + damage

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:25

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1) California’s draconian emission regulations - bring back the rolling 25 year exemption. Can it pass a smog check without using OEM or CARB parts? If it can, it’s good to go. Hell, just nuke CARB entirely - it had outlived it's usefulness and is now just a nuisance.  I grew up in CA during the ‘70s and ‘80s and remember how bad the smog was and I’m not advocating an emissions free-for-all, but instead want reasonable rules that keep the air clean and allow for interesting vehicles.

2) 25 year gray-market bans - do like Canada and bring it down to 15 years or so. It’s hardly even necessary now that most places around the world have very similar safety and emissions rules. While we’re at it, how about having the US drop some of the crazy regulations that the DOT has in place that have prevented such innovations as steerable headlights.

3) Chicken Tax - It’s over 50 years old and needs to die. Do you want to stifle innovation and protect second-tier products? Laws like this are how you do it.

4) Red turn signals - these need to go.

I’m sure I could come up with more but these will make for a good start (or conversation starter).

dogisbadob > HammerheadFistpunch 07/13/2020 at 12:25

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those springs are scary

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > MonkeePuzzle 07/13/2020 at 12:26

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Ban: Your mom. 

Cash Rewards > P5guy now GTIguy 07/13/2020 at 12:26

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Jesus fucking Christ yes. The absolute dumbest thing there is

Mercedes Streeter > facw 07/13/2020 at 12:26

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Small lifts aren’t too bad. One headlight adjustment and you’re good to go.

T he sky high lifts are the major offenders. Bumpers so high they’re useless, headlights so high they don’t actually work.

dogisbadob > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 12:27

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nope

they make parking brakes that use the regular brake pads

dogisbadob > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:27

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red turn signals

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:27

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fake vents...

they annoy me

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:28

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Ban: LED Light bars.

Ban: LED and HID Headlights on these insanely high mounted new trucks.

I’M GOING BLIND.

way2blu does a rev update > Cash Rewards 07/13/2020 at 12:28

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Depends on how you drive on the street. An exhaust that’s within autoX noise limits (91 dB at 50’ for SCCA usually) probably won’t be too bad at reasonable speed & acceleration on the street.

That said, “reasonable” is different for different drivers. I’m a very relaxed driver on the street, so straight-piping a small-displacement turbocharged engine might be more acceptable for me than for a more aggressive driver.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:28

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Everyone here

Mercedes Streeter > way2blu does a rev update 07/13/2020 at 12:29

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Mansfield bars are notorious for not really working. A lot of them pretzel and attempt to behead motorists in even minor crashes.

Seconding Mansfield bars... but also requiring them to do their job.

Jim Spanfeller > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:32

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Twitter.

Wait, that’s not exclusively car-related...

Elon Musk? No, that’s also not exclu sively car-related...

Ooh! STANCE! Yes, that’s it!

I hereby declare that all stance cars have their suspensions unmodified and dumb wheel/tire combinations erased from existence. Yessssss...

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > dogisbadob 07/13/2020 at 12:32

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My Mazda has the parking brake integrated into the rear disc but I l ike the idea of a little redundancy. If something happens to the main brakes you still have an emergency brake in the form of the parking brake since it’s a separate system.

way2blu does a rev update > Mercedes Streeter 07/13/2020 at 12:32

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Time for resourceful Oppos to invent a safer Mansfield bar (that functions like a real bumper) and market it to Truck Bros. Call it a “Manly Bar” in the hope that it’ll become trendy.

“Hey bro, my truck is taller than yours AND safer too!”

Cash Rewards > way2blu does a rev update 07/13/2020 at 12:34

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The problem is that the Miata is slow (2001) so full throttle runs to redline in first and second (and third, depending on the road), is totally reasonable  speed wise. I keep the baffle in, but "loud" and "responsibly driven" aren't mutually exclusive

dogisbadob > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 12:35

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It’s still a separate system even operating off the disc. The parking brake doesn ’t use the hydraulics of the main braking system. It uses a separate cable.

I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > dogisbadob 07/13/2020 at 12:35

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or sand/grit

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:35

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Parking without using your parking brake. I cringe and writhe in pain every time I see a car rocking back and forth on its parking pawl. I’m not a big fan of automatic transmissions, but no autobox deserves that kind of torture.

Mercedes Streeter > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:36

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Road salt has already been picked, as well as improper ride height changes and GM’s reverse light nonsense.

I’ll vote banning compliance type of Mansfield bars. Look closely at the Mansfield bars on some of the trailers you see on the highway. Lots of them are there just to comply with the law. If you were to crash into them in a small car , you’re liable to lose your head.

After safety advocacy groups pointed this out, a lot of new trailers have better bars... but you still have an incredibly high chance of running into a joke of a Mansfield bar.

Just Jeepin' > i86hotdogs 07/13/2020 at 12:37

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Except it should be a shit  box with good crash safety. Maybe mandate all new drivers use Volvos

Mercedes Streeter > way2blu does a rev update 07/13/2020 at 12:39

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Hmmm...call it a T ruck’stache?

REAL TRUCKS have a Truck'stache. lol

way2blu does a rev update > Cash Rewards 07/13/2020 at 12:39

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This is why my 1991 MR2 still has its stock muffler, same exact issue. Good point.

My 2.0T Camaro has double  the torque at half the revs, and is muffled by the turbocharger. It doesn’t have to work nearly as hard to get the same acceleration.

dogisbadob > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 07/13/2020 at 12:42

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NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

sand is nasty and clogs sewer systems. It also doesn’t actually melt the snow.

You also need much more of it for a given length of road than you’d use the salt. 7x as much.

TheD0k_2many toys 2little time > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:42

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Grumpers and angry eye jeeps. Immediately crushed and people who bought them sent to the Gulag

Jim Spanfeller > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 12:43

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I figure that most people wouldn’t even notice if the 25 year ban was lifted, and many people who do would still buy USDM cars out of conv enience and lack of importation costs. So really, there would hardly be a downside to lifting the ban, and us car enthusiasts would greatly benefit! But good luck convincing any politicians to consider that...

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > dogisbadob 07/13/2020 at 12:43

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Yeah, I know it’s separate but integrated, but I like the idea of eliminating the complexity of integrating two functions. But who am I to speak when I advocate for the kind of complex electrically-operated hydraulic power steering system on my current car...

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > HammerheadFistpunch 07/13/2020 at 12:45

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Just had to do mine. Actually I had a hub go bad, and when I got into it I found

And then, naturally, the hub wouldn’t come off at all. Said fuck it, I’m not doing this 3 times (because I hadn’t ordered brakes), for $250 someone with proper tools can do this.

I don’t know about your setup, but this is the easiest way to get the bottom bolt out that secures the hub... the whole concept of captive rotors can die in a fire. Is there actually ANY point to it?

TheD0k_2many toys 2little time > way2blu does a rev update 07/13/2020 at 12:46

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My Miata is low enough stock height 4x4s will crush it. 

Azrek > Future next gen S2000 owner 07/13/2020 at 12:48

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9000 buttons in the car. Can we tone this down or bring back dials or sliders? My favorite is the Top Gear episode it takes Hammond 12 minutes to figure out how to get the M6 into sports mode! 

The Ghost of Oppo > HammerheadFistpunch 07/13/2020 at 12:49

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Salt is also terrible for the water table 

HammerheadFistpunch > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 07/13/2020 at 12:50

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Mine is SFA so it’ s a trunnion setup. Thankfully I can do a hub in about 30-40 minutes. It’s not a huge job in terms of difficulty, just mess an annoyance .

dogisbadob > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 12:50

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In this case, integrating the two functions is actually less, not more, complicated

The disc parking brake uses the 2 pads and a c able

The drum-in-disc setup has the 2 pads, the cable, and two extra shoes, and the scary springs that push the shoes to the drum/rotor

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Jim Spanfeller 07/13/2020 at 12:50

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Exactly. The problem is that the enthusiast community doesn’t have the cash that the automakers have to sway the opinion of the politicians, or if they do, they’d rather spend it on their cars rather than buying influence. And this is why we need term limits for congress critters - it shouldn’t be a lifetime job that one has to constantly raise cash to protect, but should be a position that actually represents the citizens and is something that you do for just a few years before giving someone else a shot.

Yeah, I know I’m naive and hopelessly idealistic...

I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > dogisbadob 07/13/2020 at 12:50

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That’s a good point. I just hate salt.

HammerheadFistpunch > The Ghost of Oppo 07/13/2020 at 12:51

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yes, though here in the salt lake valley...its less of an overall issue since most of the salt started here and heads back to where we got it in the rain cycle.

MM54 > Chinny Raccoon 07/13/2020 at 12:52

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I was coming down here to post an answer that would send most of Oppo (well, the vocal ones at least) into fits of internet-rage but I’m going to change to this one as my answer as well since it’s better than what first came to mind.

MM54 > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 07/13/2020 at 12:54

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A t-handled hook, can get them just about anywhere, heck I think harbor freight has one for about $4 that should work fine

The Ghost of Oppo > HammerheadFistpunch 07/13/2020 at 12:54

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F or the rest of us with fresh water ecosystems  the side affects of road salt may one day have consequences that are irreversible .

MM54 > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 12:56

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Yes (#4 optional but understandable)

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > i86hotdogs 07/13/2020 at 12:56

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If you don't run into something in your first two years driving, someone else equally inexperienced will run into you. Seen it a million times. Start off with a vehicle you aren't afraid to make mistakes in. My sub 5k car is as safe if not more than lots of $15,000 cars I could name but it is not the end of the world when someone dings it. Still, don't ding my car. Please.

I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > MM54 07/13/2020 at 12:56

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For putting springs where they go? I just use needle nose pliers.

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > Just Jeepin' 07/13/2020 at 12:56

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Or a Chevy Cruze. 5 stars on the small front overlap crash test is better than most other cars, even Volvos, that are sub 5k.

MM54 > HammerheadFistpunch 07/13/2020 at 12:58

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I think most people see “there are more than two moving parts” and are afraid moreso than actively dislike doing drums. Unfamiliarity breeds hatred, apparently.

Future next gen S2000 owner > For Sweden 07/13/2020 at 12:58

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You failed to only ban one item, per your allotment. You are hereby banned.

Who is the Leader - 404 / Blog No Longer Available > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 12:59

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Amber all the turns!

Ban flashers in the rain. That should be an arrestable offense when you are driving a car with stupid US spec taillights as turn signals and a burn ed out CHMSL.

Bring the law to 10 years. No reason for it at all.

HammerheadFistpunch > The Ghost of Oppo 07/13/2020 at 12:59

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Its still an issue, but all our road drainage goes to the Jordan river which flows into the dead sea...aka great salt lake, where its put in evap ponds and the salt is reclaimed and the water heads up into the sky to start over.

MM54 > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 07/13/2020 at 13:00

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You need to work on some bigger drums, then ;)

(pliers work fine for the retainer springs/caps yes )

Future next gen S2000 owner > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 07/13/2020 at 13:01

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You have failed to ban only one item, per your allotment. You are hereby banned.